Mommy

the chairs was filled

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it was when I was gonna be a freshman In high school..it was Oriantation ..a day that they show you around ..well I went to a class and say down and the teacher was talking then my phone rang and I went More

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horrifying

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Not just embarrassing – horrifying. I was at work, I’m an RN working in a birth center, riding up in the elevator to our L&D unit, and there was a man with his little boy of about 4 years old, and the More

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MY mom`s old habbit

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When I was a child, and I did somthing bad, my Mom, would licke me! And that preety much kept me from doing bad things. But just last week, I had snuck out, and my mom told me that she was going to punishe More

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3 year old doctor

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so i was babysitting a 3 year old girl and im a 17 year old girl, so she wanted to play doctor. she said “ill be the doctor” and i was like ok, so she was all “you have to take youe clothes off like More

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I LOVE YOUR MOMMY

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one time my mom was at work and I called her cell but by mistake I called somweone else and before they said hi I yelled ‘I LOVE YOUR MOMMY’ ‘WHEN ARE YOU COMING HOME?’
they were like What the fuck?

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HEY THAT PICKLE IS JUST LIKE ROMAN’S LITTLE BOY PARTS

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When my daughter Larisa was 3 I took her to the deli. Our son Roman was about 5 months old at the time and recently when my husband and I were changing Rowan’s diaper she had asked why he didn’t have what she had in her diaper. So we explained it was his boy parts. So we were at the deli and I was getting two pickles for lunch. All of the sudden as I was putting the 2nd pickle into the bag, she yelled “MOMMY! OH OH!! HEY THAT PICKLE IS JUST LIKE ROMAN’S LITTLE BOY PARTS!!!” I instantly regretted we had told her about the boy parts and as I made my way out of the store with everyone laughing I wanted to hit myself for telling her. But now she is 18 and it always gives us a good laugh when we are down. I have a bunch more, but I think this one is good for now. Lol.

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Mommy why do you have hair on your bits

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Over the summer when we were in a public restroom, I took my then 4 year old daughters in the stall with me, and I went also. What I felt was loud, my daughter says “Mommy why do you have hair on your bits?” And my other daughter before I could say anything says “Katie, ONLY mommys have hair on their bits” I could hear the other women in there laughing, and when we walked out of the stall, still were.

Smile: That reminds me of myself, and my children. Except I had my children as a teen, but at 21 (I also look like I am 12-14) and they are 5. My daughter said something about having to be a grown up to do something. And I said well I am a grown up. And my daughters says no mommy you’re a kid grown up. I’m still not sure what that means.

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my mom looks really little

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Oh I’m really way too embarrassed to say the absolute worst thing.

BUT, I will tell you what my daughter told her friends and the preschool teacher overheard and told me, years ago.
Her friends were talking about how young her mommy looks (I actually look 12, it’s pretty embarrassing.. I could pass for 14 on a good day). Anyway, I was a young mom and I was 22 at the time of this little conversation. My daughter says, yeah my mom looks really little. One girl says, “how old do you think she is?” My daughter said, “probably like a teenager or something.”
The teacher heard what she said and told me that she couldn’t stop laughing all day, every time she thought of it.
Thanks, daughter!

eta-michelle I had her as a teen, too. So technically, yeah.. 22 was young to have a preschooler but still. I wasn’t that young. lol

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I want to buy a new Mommy

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My daughter (3) told my parents and my husband and me as we drove
Daddy can we got Wal Mart
he said for what
she said I want to buy a new Mommy
Yey I flip back and look at her everyone start laughping
He said shure why not
she said i want a new mommy and this one too.
Why she siad it i don’t know
A ew days later we went to WAL MART and I said did you find the new Momy she said no there all ugly lets go.

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where is the bathroom my mommy pees alot

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the little girl i babysit, everywhere she goes she informs everyone that her mommy is having a baby so she eats and pees alot so she has to know where the bathroom is at all times.
so when the little girl i watches walks into anywhere she goes, ‘scuse me, wheows the baffroom my mommy tinkles lots”

translation” excuse me, where is the bathroom my mommy pees alot”.

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