Funny/kind of embarrassing story. I live in a small town in Idaho. Everyone pretty much knows everyone. Our family doctor lives two doors down and she and our family are all on a first name basis. Except we call her Dr. Heidi.
Anyway it was time to get my yearly sports physical done and in years past, I either dropped by her office or her house and she would just sign off on it.
Anyway. I dropped by her office like always and they put me in a room. The MA asked if I had any problems and I said no, that I just needed my physical form filled out. When Dr. Heidi came in, she said that we needed to do a real exam this year but it would just be a quick one. She asked if I minded if her medical assistant training could come in and observe and I said it was ok. When she came in though I recognized her as someone who I had known from high school a year ahead of me and she had been in our house and hung out with my sister before. I don’t know why I thought she was going to be from somewhere else, and I don’t know why Dr Heidi didn’t think of that, but then I don’t know why I didn’t realize what was coming.
She looked over the new physical exam form form and had me take off my shirt and listened and let Lupe listen. She was teaching as she went. It was all very entertaining.
Dr. Heidi then started to explain to Lupe that I was and old friend of the family and that she had taken care of me since I was a baby and that I was fine being a teaching model. It was at this moment that I realized that there was more coming.
Okay Andy. Go ahead and drop your shorts.
I honest to God thought I was going to pass out. My heart started racing like crazy. This was the first time that any woman had seen me without clothes since I started puberty and the first one was going to be one of my older sisters friends. It wasn’t like Lupe was super cute or anything. She’s kind of chubby and usually very very quiet. That didn’t seem to make it that much easier though.
The other thing is that I am not one of those guys that is hung like a porn star. Not even close. I am very self-conscious about my body and my very very slow trip through puberty. Well. It was embarrassing. And it sort of got worse.
Dr. Heidi checked for lumps and hernias and all that stuff. She then asked Lupe if they had done pelvic exams in their class. She said that they had worked with female models but not any male models. Seriously Lupe? You could have just said yes.
Dr. Heidi, who is sitting on a stool doing all this, looks up at me and says: you’re okay with this arent you Andy? It’s all professional. Yeah professional. Except that I’m 16 and she is 18 years old. I just nodded my head because I still wasn’t able to make words. I don’t know what I was expecting but at this point, Dr. Heidi stands up and let’s Lupe sit on the stool! And Lupe never even looks up or anything. Just stares straightahead.
I guess if I was more experienced and had had a steady girlfriend or something it wouldn’t have been so freaky. Or even if these were total strangers and I could just disappear. But it’s a small town and I was going to bump in to Lupe again. so Lupe felt my testicles. And had me cough. And had to ask Dr. Heidi why one side was lower than the other.
Just when I thought that this was over, Lupe starts asking about the prostate. Dr. Heidi rubbed the tip of her nose or something and said it feels firm like the end of your nose and in younger men the prostate isn’t very big. But then, unbelievably, she looks at me and says:
Well Andy’s dad has a really big prostate and has had one for a long time so if it’s okay with Andy maybe we can check he is. Just to be sure.
Seriously? I really didn’t want to do this. That Dr. Heidi said: Andy. I’ll make you a deal. No charge for today’s visit.
Dr. Heidi only charges $50 but I had to pay for that myself and I didn’t have much money so I said, I guess that’s fair, and she said okay. What you have to do is spread your feet apart and just bend over the table and let yourself completely relax.
My heart now is beating so fast I think I am going to have a heart attack. I am fumbling trying to get my shorts off around one of my shoes so I couldn’t so I just ended up kicking off my shoes and my shorts and boxers so I am standing there now completely naked except for my socks. And Lupe still is sitting on the stool staring at you know what. So I bent over the exam table and Dr. Heidi put a bunch of goo on her finger and i’d like to say that it wasn’t that bad but it was really uncomfortable. Then came Lupe’s less trained finger and that was even worse.
When they were done, Dr. Heidi said: Andy! You were awesome! And Lupe looked at me and said something like: thank you so much.
And I got dressed and left.
Weird story and I couldn’t tell my friends and I had to tell someone so I am telling all of you. Funny thing though. I saw Lupe when I was gassing up my car and she was in buying something and came out and said that she could tell I was really uncomfortable and felt bad for me but she learned a lot and everything is confidential and private and she would keep the whole thing to her self. She said that if I ever went to medical school or something like that that I could give her a call and she would pay back the favor. We had a good laugh and that was that.